Marston’s theory and its successor systems use the adjective “dominant” to describe this personality type, which in my opinion and experience is quite misleading; it suggests that this type alone has dominance. This is far from the truth! There are different forms of dominance; only one version of these is noticeable in the case of a Ruler. But Rulers do want to rule, to control things! Control energises the Ruler throughout their life. It is not their only motivation, but it is definitely the most crucial element of their personality! Let us also clarify right at the outset of the personality type analysis that is it extremely rare — although it may occur, especially in the field of sport — for a person to clearly exhibit the characteristics of just one personality type without exhibiting characteristics of other types. But when learning about the personality types and reading the descriptions, keep in mind that our explanations start by assuming that the given personality type appears as that person’s one and only type!
The Ruler is a determined, dominant, wilful, and often aggressive person whose most important motivations are dominating and controlling others, achieving the status that comes with this, and showing this status to the outside world. For the Ruler, it is important to be recognised and respected in a given environment and to be looked upon highly by the people, to be considered as a leader, even if they aren’t one. It is typical for them to show their position and status to the outside world. For this reason, brand-named clothes, expensive cars, and premium status items play important roles in their lives. The environment of Ruler is “expensive” and “smells of money”. It’s important for them that the people around them see that they have money. They like to exaggerate this show and over-promote themselves, and for this, they sometimes pay a high price. They often find themselves in situations where the created image simply collapses. But they don’t panic because we’re talking about a rather proactive personality type that is able to rebuild. A Ruler needs this ability, as they also have good and bad moments with other people. They develop new relationships quickly, but these bonds are neither nurtured nor respected. This is why people give up on them after a while. This is a problematic fact because other personality types are keen on following the Ruler, so the frustration is palpable when their true personality, which in most cases lacks empathy, comes to the surface. This attitude puts a stamp on both their business careers and their private lives. They create a lucrative business or build up a good-looking partnership in a blink of an eye, but then they fail to maintain it. Money is particularly important to them, and they tend to have a particularly good sense of investment. They can make sacrifices in the present to earn greater profits in the future.
For a long time, this personality type has benefited from a pervasive, yet incorrect business myth. Professionals believed that only a Ruler could be a good leader. In this way, this personality has become the number one measuring tool for leadership training and selection. This, of course, forced leaders of different personality types to play a Ruler role. One of the most typical business modifications is the shift towards the Ruler type, usually in the case of the Supporter type, which is located on the opposite pole of the psychological circle, who wears this mask in the hope of getting a better salary. Today, the picture is more nuanced, and skilled professionals know full well that this personality type, like all others, is an appropriate solution for only certain types of management positions, and there are situations in which they are completely incapable. But you shouldn’t be surprised by this. Each personality type has its advantages and disadvantages, so there are situations where this type should be utilised and others where they should be avoided. The perception of the Ruler type is the one that has probably changed the most in recent decades. Moreover, this change in perception constantly affects their lives. After all, where proactivity is needed, they are essential. They can decide right away, so there is always a beginning and an end to a process. On the other hand, their decisions are, in most cases, superficial, not well thought out, and as a result, there may be problems with implementation. But it is certainly still true that “it’s better to make a bad decision today than to make no decision at all”. Obviously, this is not applicable in every situation, but it often rings true. Rulers can be scornful, arrogant, and selfish. It is programmed in their personalities. Many people are “beneath them”. The Ruler likes to value people based on position and financial background. As a result, the environment a person comes from also plays an important role in the selection of their human relationships. It is rare for a Ruler to have a friend that they cannot be proud of. Perceptions of Rulers have changed in light of these characteristics. After the last global economic crisis, they gained prominent roles because they can take risks, create new strategies, are not afraid of change, and can easily manage even the most challenging situations. Moreover, they also find solutions to them. As a result, no matter if their character is far from sympathetic, companies were forced to accept this personality type after the crisis. Then, as the economy started to stabilise, human factors came to the fore and the Ruler was no longer as desirable in business. Whatever the case, they always have and will continue to have a place in any economy. For them, what kind of society they live in and the of society’s overall personality type are critically important. Obviously, they cannot succeed in Supporter societies as well as they do in Ruler ones.
The Private Life of the Ruler Type
The private life of the Ruler is, let’s say, volatile. Sometimes they are up and sometimes they are down, so if Rulers do not know themselves — unfortunately, their self-criticism is not so strong — then they often encounter surprising situations. For them, a private life is a refuge where they expect full service from their partner. An ideal relationship for a Ruler is with a partner who provides full support and who, of course, behaves, dresses, and looks like a real Ruler. They are aware of the fact that for them, building a long-term relationship is the biggest challenge in their lives, and that is why they start working on this at an early age. It is common for Rulers to develop lifelong relationships during high school or university. This stability is necessary for them to be able to concentrate on their careers and themselves. If they find the right companion, they will “lock it down”, and even though Ruler may not be a loyal type by default, they can bind themselves to their companion forever and take good care of them. At least that’s the plan. However, in many cases, they can push the envelope too far, and though the supportive partner tolerates it for a long time, it eventually ends up in a shocking result for Ruler. Shocking, because the quiet, even self-sacrificing companion does not complain, does not speak, but simply reaches their limit, and then the process is unfortunately irreversible. The Ruler cannot deal with this situation, as it shakes their life’s foundation. The more intelligent Rulers, of course, maintain a healthy balance between the duties of partnership and selfish individual interests, so they can build long-term, stable relationships. It is paramount that their family is also successful and in the spotlight! In fact, success only matters if it is in the spotlight. A lot of thought goes into the decision to have a baby for a Ruler man, because the child must be a “star”. The child needs to stand out from the crowd and show results so to make their father proud. If the child is not blessed with the ability to satisfy their father’s pride, then their childhood might not be the easiest. I know it’s terrible to read, and it’s not easy to write down either, but when the Ruler dad truly confronts this fact, most of the time, their love for their child wins out. And if even one Ruler dad reads these lines and changes their behaviour towards their child, then it was worth mentioning. As you may have noticed, Rulers can be extreme in family situations. For them, their small, chosen family is the most important, and their interest in their biological family can be quickly lost unless there is a family member that they can be proud of in every way. Therefore, the Ruler-led family does not want to have a good relationship with all members of the extended family at all costs. They do not want to waste their time on unnecessary formalities dictated by society. Because they are quite outspoken, they are not afraid to offend their environments, but let’s add that they do this mostly to protect their immediate family members. Moreover, they manage their family, earn money for them, and want to provide them with a high standard of living. They will protect and stand up for their family members under all circumstances, even if it comes at a great cost.